Tuesday, 16 March 2010

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Is it a sin if one does not feel comfortable with a particular person?

Question:
I have a sister whom I don't like. We have not been on good terms for quite some time and I really don't like her. I say Salam and I try to be polite when I speak to her. I avoid being around her or talking to her for too long. Is this considered a sin?.

Answer:
Praise be to Allah. What the Muslim should do is refrain from bearing any hatred or resentment in his heart towards his fellow Muslim. According to a hadeeth, the Prophet Pbuh said:
“Do not hate one another, do not envy one another, do not turn your backs on one another, and be, O slaves of Allah, brothers. It is not permissible for a Muslim to forsake his brother for more than three days.”
[Bukhaari]

But a person may feel that he does not like a person enough for him to become a close friend, even though he fulfils his Islamic duty of returning his salaams, saying “Yarhamuk-Allah (May Allah have mercy on you)” if he sneezes, helping him if he needs help, and so on. In this case what exists between them does not come under the heading of forsaking or shunning and it is forgiven insha-Allah.

According to a hadeeth, the Prophet Pbuh said:
“Souls are troops collected together and those who got along with one other (in the realm where souls existed before entering physical bodies in this world) will have an affinity with one another (in this world) and those amongst who did not get along with one another (in the realm where souls existed before entering physical bodies in this world) will also not get along (in this world).”
[Bukhaari]

Al-Khattaabi said: This may be understood as referring to similarlity between souls which are either good or bad, righteous or immoral, and that good people are attracted to those who are like them and evil people are likewise attracted to those who are like them, so people’s souls recognize one another according to their nature, whether good or evil; if they are similar they will get along and if they are different they will not get along.

Al-Qurtubi said: Although souls have in common the fact that they are all souls, they differ in other ways. Souls of similar nature will get along because of their nature. Therefore we see people of a certain type get along, but they do not get along with people of a different nature, and we see that with people who are of a similar nature, some of them get along with one another and some do not, and that depends on the issues which form the basis of getting along or otherwise.

Edited from: Islam Q&A

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